On the tree it is beautiful, smells great, and gives promise of good things to come. As it continues on the life giving branch it continues to grow and mature, but the very instant it ceases to grow it begins to rot. Even though it still looks good and taste good the rotting process has begun. For some time it will have the appearance of being everything God intended it to be but, the truth is that if it is not growing it is rotting. In the same way this is an example of what takes place in our marriages. We grow during the courtship process and maybe even through the honeymoon and maybe the first year of marriage. Then we begin to take the relationship for granted, and become less intentional about nurturing and investing in it. The result, the rotting process begins. Like the orange we sit in church looking good only to later become a statistic of another devastated family leaving those around us surprised to hear that another marriage has ended in divorce. While no one enters into marriage with failure in mind it often (about 50%) ends up that way. Why is it that we will invest in the maintenance of our vehicle, or buy a new golf club to improve our game, or spend money on pleasure, but not invest in the growth of our marriages? I am amazed at the number of men that respond to my question, “how’s your marriage?” with, “we’re coasting”. Don’t we realize that you can only coast down hill? Wendy and I made a commitment to each other on three rules when we began talking about marriage.
- Our marriage would be centered on Christ.
- Divorce would never be an option to solving our problems. We won’t even mention the word.
- We would never stop investing in our marriage.
After 24 years of marriage we still take in marriage seminars and retreats. We read books together on marriage and relationships. And we invest in training.
If you want what you have never had then you must be willing to do what you haven’t been willing to do in the past. Marriage is hard work but, the reward far outweighs the cost. You invest in your marriage and reap the dividends not withdrawals, because the moment you start taking from the marriage relationship you begin to damage it.
I encourage every man to make a fresh commitment today before it is too late and invest in your marriage. The woman that God has entrusted to your care is His precious daughter and according to 1 Peter 3:7 “You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. (NASB)
For more information on Unlimited Discipleship Ministries go to www.udministries.org or contact Mike and Wendy at mwbehar@gmail.com
